I keep thinking: I hope this is the hardest thing I have to deal with in my study abroad experience. I'm sure it won't be, though. And really, what foreign study program would be complete without a total meltdown?
This morning I left home with two rolling suitcases and a backpack (messenger bag, actually) and said goodbye to my parents and Caleb. I'll see my parents again in December--I'm really looking forward to their visit, and I'll miss them in the meantime. Saying goodbye to Caleb was (is) painful because I really have no idea when I'll see him again. Because of that, we are broken up, and that's tough. I know things will work out in some way that will turn out fantastically, but right now I just can't imagine what that will look like.
Thankfully, I'm spending tonight and tomorrow with Colleen in Detroit. Hopefully I'll be able to gain some composure and get my bearings before I leave the country tomorrow night and lose both of those things.
Leaving loved ones can be hard. I know myself, from my experience leaving Lili when I left China and leaving Sara when I left the U.S., that it is especially breaking when you don't know when you will see the person again, if ever. I have faith in you though, in two ways. First, I know that you are not so foolish as to let the yearnings for faraway people tarnish your adventurous and eye-opening experience in Senegal. Secondly, I suspect that you are emotionally more secure that I have been when I have said goodbyes to people that I loved; I know that you have had a lot of emotionally difficult times in the past, but I have been very flighty and light in my relationships, never giving as much as my partners wanted. I believe that what you have recently shared with that tall, awkward friend of mine was a much deeper bond than I have shared with anyone, so if you want to find that again someday I have no doubt that you will be able to.
ReplyDeleteMiss you,
-Joe
did you remember what you thought you were forgetting yet?
ReplyDeleteWe know you're going to have a fabulous adventure and that makes it worth the sadness of your leaving. We love you tons!
ReplyDelete